10 Things That Look Better Than The Amazing Spider-man’s Lizard

Posted 8 years ago by Movies

The Lizard

I liked The Amazing Spider-man. I really did. I liked almost everything about it, with one glaring exception: the design of The Lizard. I was so excited when they announced that The Lizard would be the villain in this movie, but when the designs started to leak, I was a little bummed. When I finally saw the movie, I liked the character but the snoutless, generic Lizard design didn’t do much for me. So, to avoid actually working today I’ve been making a list of 10 things that look better than The Lizard.

As with most ‘silly lists’ on Top Hat Sasquatch, this is mainly a joke. Keep that in mind before you rage in the comments section.

Goombas!

The Goombas from the Super Mario Bros Movie

The Goombas from the Super Mario Bros movie were the first things I thought of when I saw The Lizard. Bald, scaly, and a big toothy grin. Exactly what The Lizard could have looked like in a 90s Spider-man movie, had they decided to ditch the snout and make it look ridiculous. I don’t know if a snout would have made The Lizard look that much better, but what is so unrealistic about growing a snout vs. growing a tail?

LEGO Lizard Man

Lizard Man LEGO Minifigure

LEGO’s Lizard Man may be tiny and made of plastic, but look at how awesome he looks! Don’t tell me you wouldn’t rather watch him romp around New York, fighting Spider-Man and causing mass destruction. Seriously though, if LEGO can nail a Lizard design in that simple form, you’d think a big movie studio could make one that looks better.

Gorn

Gorn from Star Trek

I think Gorn woud have been a good compromise between the more animal-like lizards and the man-in-suit look. His snout isn’t that long, but it’s there. Swap his caveman getup for a labcoat and you’ve got yourself a Dr. Conners that’s primed and ready to battle Spidey in a rocky desert somewhere.

Leatherhead!

Leatherhead

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ sewer-dwelling alligator villain Leatherhead may be a bit sillier than The Lizard, but at least he looks like the species he is based on. Seeing as how TASM’s Lizard spent a good portion of the movie in a sewer, I had to include this one. He actually illustrates a point, even in action figure form. You totally could have had The Lizard keep his lab coat on for more than a split second.

A Zorgon!

The Zorgons from Zathura

I never here Zathura get any love, but it’s a movie I find myself watching quite a bit. A semi-sequel to Jumanji (aka, Tommy’s Nostalgia Explosion) and directed by Mr. Iron Man himself, Jon Favreau, Zathura features a badass race of space lizards called Zorgons. One of the reasons why I like this movie so much is it’s use of practical effects. The Zorgons are mostly costumes and animatronics, rather than CG. They look a little too much like the baby Godzillas from the 1998 movie, but they drive a cool retro spaceship so that makes up for it. It makes me want a Spider-Man movie with practical Lizard effects.

Robbie from Dinosaurs

Robbie Sinclair from Dinosaurs

He’s technically a dinosaur, but Robbie Sinclair has a snout and is clearly wearing a jacket, two things the makers of The Amazing Spider-man couldn’t pull off. He may look more suited to carry a boombox or ride a skateboard than fight superheroes, but he’s still smooth. When I was little I pretty much wanted to be Robbie Sinclair when I grew up. Spoiler: it didn’t happen.

Snizard

Snizard from Power Rangers

Ok, so maybe not, but as this post is just turning into a round-up of awesome and/or ridiculous lizard-based creatures from my nostalgia, why not? Talk about cross-species genetics. Snizard looks like a lab assistant that fell into a vat of ooze, rolled in a couple hundred snakes, and got eaten by a Komodo Dragon. The dude has snake hands! How bad would it suck to get punched/biten by one of those? Snizard fun fact: he was first voiced by Breaking Bad star Bryan Cranston.

Wally Gator

Wally Gator

If Spider-Man had been animated in the style of the 60s Hanna Barbera animal comedies, Wally Gator totally would have played The Lizard. Wally really helps me point something else out; why couldn’t TASM’s Lizard been a bit more two-tone? The CGI Lizard just looked like a scaly, dark-green blog most of the time. He could have had a bit more color. He wouldn’t need to sound like Ed Wynn or anything, but a little more Wally Gator and a little less Goomba would have been nice.

Crocodile Dentist

Crocodile Dentist

I’ll just leave this here.

Lizards

All Other Versions of The Lizard Ever

Bottom line, I really liked The Amazing Spider-Man, I just happen to think it’s version of the The Lizard was the weakest. The character was cool, but the design sucked. I could be wrong, maybe a big snouted alligator man would look horrible in a modern super hero movie, but call me old fashioned. I like the lab coat and heck, even the purple pants.

Maybe in ten years they’ll reboot Spider-Man again and we’ll get a new version. Only time will tell.
  • John

    Totally agree on the Goomba comparison, the animation and modeling was pretty weak as well. I wish they would have developed his character a little more too.

  • Casey

    ‘The Amazing SpiderMan’ managed to be possibly my alltime favorite superhero movie, and I seem to be largely alone in that sentiment, so it was a relief to see that this didn’t degenerate into yet more ripping on it.

    And… well, I agree wholeheartedly! The Lizard was written pretty fantastically, but his design was bland as hell.
    He does look a bit better in motion than in stills, I’ll admit, with all the focus on his big, hooked claws and his long, wriggly tail. He even swam like a real lizard, and the mouth that opens extra wide was a nice touch. But at the end of the day, it just felt like them pulling back on things that they were fully capable of realizing. The human face doesn’t make him look more believable or less comic book(Though why you’d WANT a comic book movie not to look comic book is beyond me…) it just makes him look dull. If I didn’t have context, I’d take one look at him and think he was Abomination, or some weird new take on the Hulk.