About That TMNT Movie I Don’t Care About

I promise I don’t care about a TMNT movie produced by Michael Bay and starring Megan Fox, but since I’m completely obsessed with the Turtles I’m at least keeping an eye on the news. Set photos recently pegged Arrested Development’s Will Arnett as playing the whiny cameraman Vernon Fenwick from the 80s cartoon, which is actually kind of cool casting. Still, Megan Fox?

For a movie that is already shooting and supposedly comes out next summer, there is a surprising lack of casting and plot details. The no-name actors that were revealed as being the Turtles could be voices or motion-capture only, but no one has said. Weird.

I was checking IMDB to see if anyone else had been announced and saw this plot logline that I hadn’t seen anywhere else. If this is official, it kind of explains Bay’s dumb comments about the Turtles having extraterrestrial origins in the movie.

Aliens invade Earth and inadvertently spawn a quartet of mutated reptile warriors, the Ninja Turtles, who rise up against them to defend the world.

That makes sense, the movie could treat Krang/the Kraang/the Utroms as an alien invasion, and their ooze give birth to the Turtles. That sounds fine for a movie, and I’m all for a TMNT movie that goes for 80s cartoon nostalgia, I just wish it was in better hands.

One thing I think is a guarantee though is that if Vernon Fenwick is in this movie, Bebop and Rocksteady have to be in it too. I’ve wanted those characters in a live action Turtles movie since I was little, and even if this movie sucks as bad as I think it will, I’ll see it for that reason alone.

I would also count on seeing the Technodrome pop up in this movie, but I doubt we’ll be lucky enough for it to have a giant eyeball on top.

Seriously though, how has there not at least been a Shredder casting announcement yet? Somebody call Ken Watanabe.